When Your Boss Makes You Feel Incompetent [10 Things To Do]

When Your Boss Makes You Feel Incompetent [What to Do]

When Your Boss Makes You Feel Incompetent [What to Do]. Your boss is supposed to act as a team leader, so why do they seem fixated on making you feel incompetent? If your boss scolds you for things that are out of your control, they’re trying to make you feel incompetent.

When they try to make you feel as if it’s your fault that you don’t know something that is far beyond your job description, it’s easy to feel as though you’re the incompetent one. This is a fairly common practice by your worst bosses. In this case, it’s usually the manager that has low emotional intelligence and has the inability to grasp the concept of educating others instead of berating them. 

What to do when your boss makes you feel incompetent

What to do briefly when your boss makes you feel incompetent?

Try to acknowledge the situation. If you were never trained on an internal process, point this out. Consider saying something to the extent of “I was never formally trained on this process, so I wasn’t aware of this requirement. This is great information that I’ll be mindful of going forward.” If it continues and gets worse, consider talking to colleagues to get their thoughts, or consider filing a formal complaint with HR.

Top 10 Things To Do When Your Boss Makes You Feel Incompetent

1. Determine the Cause

You need to be sure that your boss is the one making you feel incompetent. Many times, it’s people’s own insecurities that make them think someone else is putting them down. Make sure that you analyze the situation one more time and then decide whether your boss did something hurtful or not. You can now advance to the following step if you’re sure that you’re not just engaging in perfectionism or trying to stretch yourself beyond your means.

2. Practice self-compassion

When your boss makes you feel incompetent, it can be easy to beat ourselves up and question our abilities. However, self-compassion is one of the best ways to deal with these types of feelings. By being kind and understanding towards yourself, it shows that you value yourself as an individual. This can help you cope with feeling incompetent at work and prevent you from falling into a cycle of self-doubt.

3. Start Searching for Another Job

Making you feel incompetent certainly shows a lack of appreciation on your boss’s part. You have no obligation to stay at your current place of employment if you don’t have a contract in place. That means you can turn in your resignation any time you like and search for a job where your boss won’t make you feel incompetent. Therefore, you can leave the position if you’ve tried all the other avenues and nothing seems to work.

4. Request a Meeting With Your Boss

You can resolve the issue once you confirm that your boss is legitimately messing with your self-esteem and confidence. Try requesting a meeting between the two of you. You can address the issue if your boss agrees to the meeting. You can meet with your boss alone, or you can request that a third party attend the meeting. Sometimes, meeting participants request additional people so that they can have an eyewitness.

5. Remember that everyone makes mistakes sometimes

Remembering this fact can help you put your own challenges into perspective and it reminds you that you are not alone. Additionally, when you remember that everyone is human, you become less judgmental of yourself and others.

6. Build a support network of colleagues and friends

When your boss makes you feel incompetent, it can be tough to face the challenge alone. However, when we have a support network of colleagues and friends, we become less reliant on our boss’s approval. These people can provide us with emotional support when we are feeling down, as well as helpful advice and feedback when we need it.

7. Discuss the Issue With Human Resources

You may go to the human resources department if the problem doesn’t subside. HR sometimes serves as a middle point between workers and the company. They offer solutions to many of the issues that occur in the workplace. But, you must understand that human resources works for the company, and therefore, they are there to protect the company’s best interests. Note that your situation might be eligible for a report and reasonable action.

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8. Remove It From Your Mind

Try your best not to take the behavior personally, even if it is what you think it is. Sometimes bosses make their employees feel incompetent when they are insecure. Therefore, don’t internalize anything harsh that your boss says to you. Try to think of your boss and look at that person with compassion and empathy. That person must be struggling a lot to go out of his or her way to chop you down.

9. Seek training and education

Ask your manager for suggestions or training resources that could help you improve in the work areas that were identified as your problem areas. You might also want to do an online search or ask your peers for suggestions. This type of action demonstrates initiative and shows that you genuinely care about your work performance.

10. Acting as if you know what you’re doing

When your boss makes you feel incompetent, it can be tough to maintain our confidence. However, by pretending to be confident, you can actually start to feel more confident in yourself. By acting as if you know what you’re doing, even when you don’t, you can trick your brain into thinking that you are a competent professional. This can help you feel more in control and boost your confidence when you need it the most.

Why Will Your Boss Make You Feel Incompetent?

1. Micromanagement.

If your boss is constantly flooding you with emails and calls during work hours, asking you to cc him or her on everything you do, that could mean one thing, which is he/she is trying to control how you spend your time and monitor your activities. Micromanagers often have poor interpersonal skills. They tend to be controlling, demanding, and rude toward those around them. Here are some Psychological Effects Of Micromanagement & Signs Of Micromanagement.

2. Your Boss Is Playing Favorites.

Your boss tends to focus on one particular area of expertise, such as technology, marketing, sales, etc. and will single out that individual for special attention. They seem to prefer to compliment certain individuals more frequently than others. Or they choose their favorites for special projects because they don’t trust anyone else but a select few.

3. Insecurity.

Insecurity can lead to a number of negative behaviors. For example, it could make you choose easy over hard work. Or it could affect how you treat your colleagues. If your boss is insecure, he or she may take advantage of your efforts to help him or her. He/she may also use your assistance to cover up mistakes.

4. The Company Has a Toxic Culture.

If you’re excited about what you do every day, you’ll probably love the work environment. But sometimes people don’t realize the impact of the culture they are joining. Nearly half of Americans are unhappy with their jobs found from a recent survey. And while some companies blame external forces, others say it’s the employees themselves who aren’t happy.


FAQs – When Your Boss Makes You Feel Incompetent [What to Do]

How should I react if my manager makes me feel incompetent?

Don’t panic or get angry. Have a constructive discussion with your manager to understand their perspective. Suggest solutions like getting additional training or finding a mentor. Stay positive and show you want to improve.

How can I regain my boss’s confidence in my abilities?

Ask for specific feedback on where your boss feels you fall short. Develop those skills by volunteering for projects utilizing them. Consistently deliver excellent work. Eventually your achievements will outweigh any past doubts your boss had.

What are some common signs my boss thinks I’m incompetent?

Some signs include your boss micromanaging you, no longer giving you opportunities, constantly criticizing your work, overexplaining simple things, taking over your tasks, and excluding you from important meetings.

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